Australian all-rounder Moises Henriques has opened up about his battles with depression which once forced him to contemplate crashing his car during a first-class match.
The 33-year-old, despite his all-round talents, has played just 11 ODIs, 11 T20Is and four Tests for Australia.
“If you looked up the depression symptoms on Google, I was ticking off almost every single one of them and quite severely,” Henriques, who has played for many IPL teams including four-time winners Mumbai Indians, is quoted as saying on Ordineroli Speaking podcast with broadcaster Neroli Meadows.
“I remember lying in bed wanting to (self medicate) for a long time and considering all the different types of drugs that would be possible. At this stage, I was like who would I call? I wasn’t even thinking of recreational or party drugs.
“I was thinking where do I get these opioids and these things that are going to numb my brain to a point of not thinking where I’m not capable of thought.”
Henriques recalled how once he had thought of crashing his car while driving home from Bankstown midway through a Shield match against Tasmania.
“I remember thinking to myself in the car, I’m doing 110 on the highway thinking if I just turn this car into here, into the pillar or somewhere?,” he said.
“I didn’t want to create a crash, thinking if I just ran straight into this pole what would happen? What would the consequence of what would happen there? I can’t do that, it’s not fair on my brothers, it’s not fair on Krista, it’s not fair on all these people that are there for me, I can’t leave my team with 10 men for the next two days.”
He eventually stopped his car and thought better.
“I ended up having to pull over because I was crying so heavily and I was shaking. I had to pull over, just took five minutes,” said Henriques who last played international cricket in October, 2017.
(With PTI inputs)