Former South Africa skipper AB de Villiers said that his side’s semi-final loss to New Zealand in the 2015 World Cup wore him down for about a year and played a huge role in his sudden decision to retire from international cricket.
De Villiers has scored 8,765 runs in 114 Tests and 9,577 runs in 228 ODIs for South Africa is viewed as one of the greatest modern-day batsmen.
South Africa suffered four-wicket loss to New Zealand via D/L method in a rain-affected World Cup semi-final in 2015. De Villiers admitted that he had struggled to come to terms with it.
“That really wore me down a touch but I kept playing, I tried to bite the bullet, I tried to be there. I was batting really well. I still had incredible friendships and memories,” De Villiers told commentator Harsha Bhogle in a conversation with Cricbuzz.
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The 36-year-old had called time on his 14-year-old international cricket in 2018. De Villiers had then said that he ran ‘out of gas’ after hanging up his boots.
However, the former Proteas skipper said that the New Zealand defeat played a role in his sudden decision. “From a personal point of view, yeah it played a huge role,” said de Villiers.
“We got beaten by sport on the night and it was actually a beautiful thing but it was difficult for me to get through that year and to specifically meet up with the team again a few months later, having to go again.
“Here we go again...we have to restart but I am like ‘hold on, I am not over this World Cup. It hurt too much.’ So yes, I am sensitive and those kinds of things play a huge role in how I feel and my ambitions,” he added.
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South Africa have been perennial under-achievers at the World Cup. De Villiers said he struggled to cope with the 2015 loss for about a year and regrets not opening up about it.
“The next 12 months was really tough for me,” he said.
“Maybe I should’ve been more honest about it when I look back and communicated about it. I felt like I was a little bit alone at the time, but it’s silly to say that you’re alone if you don’t seek help; if you don’t talk about it.”
He added: “If I could have it over again, I would probably open up discussions with the coach, administrators and discuss my way forward. I should’ve shared my emotions with them and things that bothered me. I didn’t.”