“This is the end of our lives; there is nowhere to go from here,” said Thupten Rabten as we sat on a bench outside Jampaling Elders’ Home, an old age home in McLeod Ganj run by the Tibetan government-in-exile. “It is straight to the cremation ground.” As we talked, we could hear the administrator make preparations for two residents who had died the day before.


Thupten Rabten


Thupten was seven when he fled Tibet in 1960.

“I was one of the kids picked out by the Chinese authorities to be sent to Beijing to study,” he said. “My father feared that I’d learn Chinese and forget the Tibetan language, that I’d be indoctrinated and turned into a communist. He thought I‘d become somebody who would break the Tibetan nation. So he brought me here.”

Sixty-three-year-old Thupten suffers from hand tremors. For many, 63 is hardly the end, but in this place, with nothing to do but wait, the sense of impending death is hard to avoid. He shares his room with 94-year old Yangkey.


Yangkey


Yangkey is unable to speak and spends most of her time counting her beads. She has no children, no family in India.


Amdo Thubten Tsering


Two years short of becoming a centenarian, Amdo Thubten Tsering is the oldest resident at Jampaling. Tsering said he fought as a guerrilla against the Chinese army in 1958. A year later, after the uprising failed, he was one of the 80,000 Tibetans who fled across the Himalayas, following the Dalai Lama’s own escape.

“I’m here, but my heart is still in Tibet,” he said. “That is my country, that is what I fought for. Now, when I hear the news from there, I’m not as hopeful about the situation as I used to be.”

On August 12 the police in Kardze, in Sichuan province, opened fire on a group of Tibetans protesting the arrest of a respected village elder, Wangdak, who had been urging local officials to allow a prayer ceremony as part of the Denma Horse Festival, arguing that a ban would be a violation of religious freedom. According to unconfirmed reports, ten protestors were wounded in the shooting, of whom four died in detention after being denied medical attention. Another committed suicide.

 
Lobsang


“I’m about to die,” Lobsang said. “Going back to Tibet wouldn’t be possible, it seems.” But he believes the Dalai Lama will find a resolution to the political deadlock.

The Dalai Lama and the government-in-exile have since 1988 scaled down their demand for total independence, or Rangzen, to what is known as the Middle Way Approach, a demand for "genuine autonomy" within China.

Many young Tibetans born in exile in India see the Middle Way Approach as an unacceptable compromise. The Middle Way Approach is also rejected by some elderly Tibetans, like the Khampa warriors of eastern Tibet, who fought the invading Chinese army in 1950 and then led an armed uprising in ’59. The US Central Intelligence Agency-backed guerrilla fighters, who operated out of Mustang in Nepal in the '60s and early '70s, and risked their lives fighting for Tibetan independence, are outraged to see the government-in-exile now recognise Chinese sovereignty.

 
Tenpa Tsering


Tenpa Tsering, 82, lost his vision to cataract, but said he fought in Lhasa in 1958 and '59, and then served in the Indian army for more than two decades.

When asked how he views the possibility of the Tibetan struggle turning violent, he replied, “The Dalai Lama has shunned violence, and that settles the matter. I think peaceful protest is the way forward, but it may not yield results.”


Ngodup Palden


Ngodup Palden said he participated in the uprising in Lhasa in 1958. He now rejects the option of an armed uprising. “It just doesn’t make sense,” he said. “We would be crushed too easily. They are just too many and too strong.” He was worried that China’s economic clout left the foreign governments unable to talk about human rights in Tibet.

In the latest instance, early in September the Dalai Lama cancelled a visit to South Africa because of trouble over a visa. It is widely believed that his presence at the annual summit of Nobel peace laureates, to be held mid-October in Cape Town, would be awkward for South Africa – a hurdle in its pursuit of stronger trade ties with China.

 
Jampa Nyichung


Jampa Nyichung grew up in a family of nomadic herders. “When the Chinese first arrived, they lied that they would make things better,” he said.

To this day, Beijing continues to sell to Tibetan nomadic communities the promise of raising their living standards. According to a 2013 Human Rights Watch report, between 2006 and 2012, hundreds of thousands of nomadic herders in the eastern part of the Tibetan plateau were relocated or settled in new permanent villages. Questioning the legitimacy of these evictions, the report raises concerns over the ability of those resettled to maintain their livelihood over time.

The nomadic way of life has been radically altered in an attempt to build a “New Socialist Countryside”, a development program planned in Beijing, aimed at improving the economy and living standards in the Tibetan region.

Jampa is mostly confined to his bed. He broke his back and lost his legs in an accident. He used his mirror to converse with me through the window, before inviting me in.

“People inside Tibet are helpless. Lamas are being jailed and the army is brutal,” he said. “These are the facts, yet the Chinese continue to lie. They tell the world that everything is fine.”

***

Surrounded by suffering, residents seek an anchor in religion. Following the Buddhist doctrine, this life’s miseries are believed to be retribution for the acts of past lives. Enduring these miseries provides hope of being born into a better afterlife.


Samdup Paljor


Samdup Paljor kept dozing off fitfully, while chanting the prayer mantra, “Om Mani Padme Hum."


Tsering Thundup


Tsering Thundup during his daily "kora" – a circumambulation of the Dalai Lama’s temple complex.

Proximity to the Dalai Lama means a lot to the residents; his temple complex and residence are a short walk from their old-age home.

“I have to say it’s nice here, but it’s not my country,” Tsering said. “I still want to return to Tibet. A day doesn’t go by when I don’t think about it.”


Tsamchoe Dolma


Tsamchoe Dolma, who had a fever, shared a fantasy with me: The Tibetan issue has been resolved, and everyone at Jampaling is filing out, to return to Tibet.

Most of the residents here fled Tibet in 1959, after the uprising was crushed. They scraped out a living in India, but even after 54 years it isn’t home to them. A lot of them did not marry, and now have no families. They know full well that return now is impossible, but live out their last days some 450 km from the border. Beyond that invisible line is their homeland.